Tuesday, 6 November 2018

Corper Sean: Baby Daddy

“Corper, I am pregnant.”

My head did a 180-degree jerk when those words hit my tympanum; it was like a bolt of electricity had been forced into my bloodstream. 

I grabbed Nonye’s hand, my grip a bit rough but I did not care. “What did you just say?”

“I am pregnant,” she repeated, calmly, as if getting pregnant was an everyday occurrence.

“B…b..but, how come? Ehn? How come?”

Nonye was my newest catch in the village. I had seen her on my way from town one day, cat-walking along the villa road and swinging her rounded backside in a way that arrested my eyes and had me coming down quickly from the cab I was in.

I had chatted her up and could immediately tell she was ‘jelling’. And why wouldn’t she? I had my Corper cap on, and she was obviously flattered that a Corper, a good-looking one at that, was talking to her.

Her accent betrayed the fact that she was not too educated, and she later confessed to me that she had had to stop her education at primary level in order to help her widowed mother at the farm.

I had easily gotten her to come see me at the lodge the very next day, but at noon when no one else was home. This was because, since I began sleeping with Felicia, I knew I was no longer at liberty to bring girls to the lodge anyhow I liked, especially since I had promised her a serious relationship. It was not very convenient for me, though. I was not as free as I used to be. But I had a plan on how to, very soon, shake Felicia off and continue my full ‘flenjoy’ life as in the past.

“Corper, say something o. Me I cannot do abortion o, you will have to come and see my mother,” Nonye’s petulant voice pulled me back to the present.

We were sitting under a mango tree not far from the school gate. She had called me during class from her mother’s phone, as she did not have one herself, saying that we needed to see urgently. Only for me to come out and hear this.

See her mother ke! What kind of wahala is this? Imagine me, Sean, becoming a baby daddy to a semi-literate village girl? With all my swag?

Omo, this is fuck up o, I said to myself. My parents would be so disappointed.

My waywardness had landed me in another big problem. Fornication is an addiction; the more you do it, the more you want it. These days, I could hardly set my eyes on anything in skirt or female trousers without wanting to see what lay underneath. And it did not help that I knew I could get anyone I wanted in that villa.

“Nonye, are you sure you are pregnant? It’s not possible na. I used protection the three times we had sex.”

Gini protection?”

“Condom, condom. I used Condom.”

"Condom dey tear na, Corper," she informed me. “Me I am sure o. I am pregnant. I miss my period two times now. I do test for city and it positive. See it.”

With that, she dug her hand into the pocket of the jean skirt she had on and brought out a folded paper, which she stretched out to me.

I took it from her and opened it. It was indeed a pregnancy test and a quick scan through showed me it was a positive result. But something she had said had me at alert.

“You have missed your period two times? Nonye, I only started having something with you about 4 weeks ago. So how is it possible that I got you pregnant since 2 months ago, ehn?” I queried.

“I… I mean to say I miss my period once, this month. C-c-corper, me I am pregnant o. The result prove am.”

I looked at the result again. It said Estimated Foetal Age was 8 weeks.

Hmm, this village girl wants to use sense for me, abi? She wants to put another man's pregnancy on my head. Well, she no reach,” I said to myself

I laughed and held the paper close to her eyes comically. “You see this thing that they wrote here? It says you are eight weeks pregnant. Mumu, it's me you want to carry another man's pregnancy and. You think I am like all the illiterate village men you deal with? Get out jor.”

She burst into tears when she saw that her plans had failed, and ran off.

I laughed after her and whistled as I went back into the school premises, glad that I had seen through Nonye’s ploy and dodged her bullet.

Sharp, bad guy like me. I had always been careful not to have unprotected sex with any of the girls I messed around with, to prevent stories that touch. In fact, since I started youth service, Corper Felicia was the only female I had slept with without condom. And it was due to the urgency of our first encounter, and subsequently, because I knew I could trust that she was clean. But of course, I always ensured this happened only during her safe times.

The school day ended with me still in great spirits and I kept whistling the song ‘Mo bo lowo won’ under my breath. I packed my stuff to leave and on looking at my phone, saw that I had a message from Felicia.

It read, “Seun there's is a big problem. I am pregnant.”

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