Hi, my name is Seun Oludumila, popularly known as Sean. I would like to share my NYSC escapades, or should I call them sexcapades, with you. Before I went for youth service, I had heard of guys having very raunchy experiences during NYSC, but I had never dreamt that those things would happen to me. Believe me, you will be shocked by all I have to share.
Let me start
at the very beginning. But before I do, I will give a brief description of myself.
I am just a young guy with average good looks; fresh face, minimal beards,
coffee complexion, average body size and height. So, don’t think I am some Mr.
Macho with killer looks. One thing, though, is the fact that I always ensure I
am well-groomed and presentable. Maybe this is what made things work out for me
the way they did while serving my father land.
Okay, now the
beginning.
I had arrived
at my appointed PPA, that fateful morning after camp, feeling very frustrated
and disappointed. First, I had runs’ed
getting re-deployed back to Lagos, only to find out at the last minute that it
did not work out. Then I was assigned, not to a corporate organization or
government house in the state capital, Umuahia, like I had hoped, but to a
secondary school. To make matters worse, it was not even a secondary school in
the city; it was in some village whose name I could not pronounce without
almost swallowing my tongue!
“Omo, no be
die I dey so?” I mused to myself in agony.
I and two
other corps members, a girl and a boy, were directed to the principal’s office
when we arrived at the school. She was a woman who looked to be in her late
fifties, and had the stern yet motherly face one would attach to female school
heads.
I was almost
bored to sleep as she listed her expectations from us, as well as their rules,
but the moment she talked about money, I became alert again.
“In this
local government area, our corper teachers…” what in the world is ‘corper teacher’? “…are paid an allowance of
four thousand five hundred naira monthly.”
I blinked.
“Ma?”
“Yes, four
thousand, five hundred naira. That is in addition to your monthly allowance
from the government.” Would it have been
part of the federal government allowance before?
“It might seem
small, but money should not be what is important to you for now. I think you
will really enjoy it here. It is a peaceful environment, the students are peaceful
and obedient, and it will make you happy to know are helping them to improve
their lives.”
“Yes, ma,”
the two otondos I came with nodded in
fervent agreement.
See these ones o, I thought. So
because I want to improve students’ lives I should starve to death here?
N19,800 from
federal government and N4,500 from the school came to a total of N24,300, not
even up to N25k. Me that in school I got a monthly allowance of N30k, and that
had not even been enough for my needs. How
was I going to survive and pay all my bill in this village with this amount?
After all the
talk, the principal asked a teacher to show us our rooms in the corpers’ lodge.
As we walked
down, I took in the school’s environment and my trepidation kept rising.
The school
was a small one, comprising of about 5 blocks of bungalow-like buildings, and
dotted heavily with trees. The buildings were brown in colour and looked old
and worn out, save for one, that was still in good shape. It was in that
building that both the principal’s office and staff room was situated.
Despite the
fact that it was small, and its buildings very old, the school was quite neatly
kept and the shade from the many trees made the atmosphere cool and breezy.
In addition to these 5 buildings
was the corpers’ lodge which had a light green colour and looked like it had
been recently painted.
“Our corpers’ lodge is fine,” the
teacher that was taking us told us proudly. “Last year corpers, they did well. They
painted and renovated it.”
At least one thing seems to be cool in this place, I thought.
But when we got into the lodge, I
found the interior disappointing. There was hardly any furniture it the rooms
we were given; each had only a mattress and a wooden chair and table. Even the
windows had no mosquito net. To make it worse the other male corper and I had
to share a room.
My frustration grew. I made up my
mind to spend as little time as possible in the village. I would constantly be going
to Lagos or Umuahia.
The next morning, we were
introduced to the students. I was surprised to see how matured many of them
looked. Especially girls. Even in their uniforms they looked more like young
women in the full bloom age of early twenties than teenagers.
I was to take the SS1 students in
Mathematics, so I started going round the classes; addressing them and taking a
look at their notes to see what they had been taught thus far.
“Corper,” one of them, a tall
female with bulging curves that had my eyes bulging too, said boldly.
"Should I help you to bring abacha this evening. It is very sweet and you
will enjoy it.”
I did not dull myself at all.
"No problem,” I told her sharply.
Not long later, I got another
proposal. This time it was from a slim one, who was a cross between fair and
dark.
"Sir, should I come and help
you wash your clothes this evening. I can help you clean your house too."
I did not waste time to accept.
“Omo, this is getting interesting.
Seems this PPA is not bad after all. I can foresee the lifestyle of a king
loading for me here.”
But I had seen nothing yet. After
school hours, I was waiting for Diran under a tree, when one of the regular
teachers came up to me. She had introduced herself as Amaka earlier.
“Corper Seun, how are you? Hope
you are enjoying our school.”
“Ah, yes. I’m enjoying it. You can
call me Sean,” I told her.
“Okay o, Corper Sean.” Then she giggled.
“It sounds like that you people’s favourite language… corper shun.”
I laughed too.
“You will really enjoy this our
village o,” she promised me. “All the things you will be eating is fresh. Even
the women here are very good wife material o... like me."
She giggled again as she said this,
as though joking. But to me, it was clear green light.
Okay, I thought, rubbing my chin. This is getting really, really interesting.
Fresh corper like us, na them dey rush us.
It was at that moment that all my
chagrin and frustration at being posted to a village disappeared. I knew I was
going to have a delicious service year.
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