Thursday, 13 July 2017


It all started with one wild thought, one bad advice, and one wrong decision.

Chime and his close pal, Tunde, were sitting at their favourite roadside bar, downing bottles of Lager and enjoying the scenery spread out before them (scenery composed of hordes of women of all shapes and sizes sashaying by), when the conversation that started it all ensued.

Choi,” Tunde exclaimed, unable to contain himself as both men gorged their eyes on a lass strutting past them, her heavily endowed upper region jiggling with every step she took, “I love girls, girls, girls…. Men, I wish I can have every girl in the world!”

“Oh, boy, this is what I will be missing once I get married. No more lookery of this nature, not to talk of even fantasizing of tasting,” Chime lamented.

In two weeks, he would be a married man and he planned to be a very faithful one. Once married, these evening hangouts would peter out if not stop completely, and definitely so would these episodes of staring lustfully at women. But he would definitely miss it! He would miss the wild thoughts that roamed free in his mind when feeding hungrily on the sight of these women, and the numerous times he had had the opportunity to take one of those eye candies to bed.

“Men, I don’t envy you oh. Very soon you will be gone… lost to the world of guilty pleasures. Thank God me I don’t plan on tying the knot anytime soon,” Tunde sympathized with him.

Chime bobbed his head in agreement, but added, “It will be worth it sha. I really look forward to starting my own family. Boys must grow up and become men someday.”

Tunde waved the last statement off impatiently, simultaneously waving off the fly that was trying to perch on his glass of Lager. “That one na the only thing wey dey make boys men? Kpanshing gan dey make boys men pass anything else, and the more women you kpansh, the more of a man you are.”

Chime chortled at that statement. His friend never ceased to crack him up with his funny way of looking at things. Tunde, Tuna as he was fondly called by Chime and their other close pals, was a very jovial, loquacious and fun-loving young man. Indeed he was the definition of ‘fun-guy’ and there was never a dull moment when hanging out with him – he was always full of thrilling gist and rib-breaking jokes. His affability did not end with men alone; women loved him too, and he always had more than a few at his beck and call, making him the go-to-guy for Chime whenever he needed to be set up with a female. It also helped that he was a good-looking fellow, light skinned with curly hair that would have had one mistaking him for a Fulani. The only minus about him was his height. He was barely above five feet two and would have been a very stunning person if he had had an impressive physique to go with his cuteness and fun personality. He would have been a total lady killer.

Chime on his own part, was tall, dark-skinned, with a moderately attractive face and a build that could easily rival that of any male model. He knew that he was just as attractive as his friend was to females, but just did not have Tunde’s magnetic charm which made them love being in his company.

Another very interesting female specimen strolled past on the sidewalk before them, and once again, both men’s eyes followed her every step as she cat-walked away, slim with long shapely fresh-skinned legs that were flaunted by the mini-skirt she had on.

“Chimex!” Tunde had caught his friend staring longer than he even he had.

Na wa o, dem no go kill us.”

“This guy, e be like say agro plenty for your body. You need to channel it out fast before your wedding o, so that you won’t go and be staring lustfully at the bridesmaids on your wedding day. Choi! That one go be big gobe o.”

Both men burst into another round of laughter at the comic, but highly possible picture Tunde painted.

“You need to discharge well-a before that day. It will also help remove your eyes from other women, since you have always said you will be very faithful to your wife once married,” Tunde suddenly advised.

Chime was shocked at the suggestion. “Haba! Tuna… just two weeks to my wedding. Come on, man!”

Ever since the day he had proposed to his wife-to-be, Anu, he had ceased his fornicating ways. Yes, he had continued to devour the tempting women that came across his path with his eyes, and even entertained wild fantasies about them, but he had never taken any step to have anything to do with any of them.

“I’m serious o. You too reason am… Number 1, you need to fully expel the lust for them pretty young things completely from your system before you say I do and become a locked-down man, so that when you see the pretty young things after marriage you won’t be moved like you are now. Number 2, you know say you and Anu have not done anything and you have been celibate since you proposed to her, which is five months now. Oh boy, you are like a ticking bomb, you need to detonate now so that you don’t go and detonate at the wrong place and wrong time. You know how seductively women can dress at weddings, omo, agro go kill you.”

Tuna, you are absurd. Agro go dey hold me towards other women for my own wedding? Lailai!” Chime guffawed at his friend’s crazy logic, however his alcohol-oiled mind had to admit that as funny and crazy as the statement was, there was some point in it.

“You know me now, you know I always yarn it as it is. Men, you need to discharge fast. At least for one last time before you get married, enjoy fornication. Then when you settle down, you stick with your wife squarely and be faithful all the days of your life. Ogbeni, enjoy yourself before you finally get locked-down forever.”

The hook caught Chime right in the jugular and he found his resolve weakening. Tunde was right, he wasn’t married yet so he could still enjoy one last ‘away’ game. Tunde always had that effect on him and all those he came in contact with, he was one of the most persuasive persons Chime had ever come across.

Seeing that his friend was already leaning towards his viewpoint, Tunde picked up his phone. “I will call Amaka, that my sarewagba in Unilag, and ask her to bring one of her friends along,” he informed Chime.

Sarewagba, a widely used Yoruba slang for ‘booty call’, was how Chime and his friends referred to girls that they could easily call up for a good time, with no strings attached. Sarewagba girls usually knew better than to expect any long term relationship to come out of their dealings with the men that called on them, and usually did it either for some quick cash or just for the sheer enjoyment of having a reckless fling. Some people referred to them as runs girls, but the difference between a runs girl and a sarewagba girl is that, a runs girl would never exchange sexual favours for free, but a sarewagba would in some circumstances; a few did not even care about money at all. A runs girl is usually more dictating of terms, like where she wants to be taken and what her monetary expectations are, while a sarewagba is very accepting of whatever her patron has in store for her.

Chime nodded sheepishly at Tunde’s proposal and found himself filling up with excitement at the thought of what was about to come. Tunde was right, five months was a long time and he had certainly missed the feel of a woman’s body.

“Amaka, my love,” Tunde was soon crooning into his phone. “I have missed you. Did you miss me?” He chuckled at whatever response he was given and continued, “Where are you now? School? Good, I’m not too far from your school. You know that bar that I am always taking you to? Come and block me there na.” Another pleased chuckle was emitted at the response he was getting. “That’s why I will always love you, babe. I am here with that my friend, Chimex. Arrange one of your friends for him too. That’s my babe. Arrange something very suitable o. My friend likes them thick in the right places.”

The girls arrived in less than hour. Tunde was the first to notice them disembarking from a bike across the road.
“Ah, our meat have landed,” he announced with relish, and made a small smacking sound with his lips.

Chimex looked in the direction of his gaze to see two girls across the road. One, tall, light-skinned with a slim, proportionate figure; the other, dark skinned and would have passed off as petite but for the luscious, heavy curves that hung to her waist and chest regions. Chimex found his jaw dropping at the view.

“Wow,” he breathed. He knew the slim, tall one was Amaka, Tunde’s constant sarewagba, so the other one with the amazing curves had to be the friend that had been brought for him.

“I can see you like what you see,” Tunde teased, smiling lasciviously.

The girls concluded their transaction with the bikeman and started walking towards them. At that moment the DJ started playing Sarz and Wizkid’s song, Samba… “Oya sare wa gba, Sisi Shalewa”…

“How apt!” Tunde exclaimed, “Like say this DJ know wetin they happen right now.” And both friends laughed.
“Hi, guys,” Amaka called out in greeting when they arrived at their table. Tunde jumped up to hug her. Chime stood up too and hugged the other girl, though not as amorously as Tunde did with Amaka.

The petite, dark girl, which Amaka introduced as Dara, one of her friends from school, was really something. She had every dark ebony skin that glowed beautifully, a pretty baby face with a pair of the brightest eyes he had ever seen on an adult, making her look as young as fifteen, but the body was anything but a fifteen year old’s. It was definitely a woman’s body with curves that could give life and take it at the same time. Chime drank in the sight of the jutting, fleshy hips in her tight Jeggings and the twin, round mounds that rose gallantly above the top of her blouse, and knew he was up for a very exciting night.

They bought the girls beers and bowls of pepper soup, and once they were all done eating and guzzling down alcohol, they headed out of the bar. Chime led Dara to his car and drove to his apartment, and Tunde did the same with Amaka.
At his apartment, they got right down to action; no time to waste. He watched eagerly as the curvaceous young lady took off her clothes and stripped completely naked. She was more than a sight for woman-starved eyes like his, with those rounded hips, well-padded backside and large breasts that sagged slightly but remained very full. In seconds, he was out of his clothes too and they were both all over each other.

It was a mind-blowing session – Dara gave as good as she got, as a matter of fact, more than she got. She was willing and down for anything and led him into many styles, moaning responsively to every touch of his and clearly enjoying every bit of the action as much as he did, even more than he, judging from the way the way she moaned like one in the top tier of Cloud Nine.

Chime so thoroughly enjoyed being with her that he went three rounds before he finally gave in to exhaustion, and slept off, as deeply sated as a baby that had been fed to the brim by its mother.

He woke up at 9.30am the next morning. That was very late and unusual for him, an early riser. The combination of alcohol and great sex from the night before was to blame. He looked at his phone and saw that he had a missed call from Anu, and was at once struck by a sharp pinch of guilt. He had really gone and done it; he had cheated on his fiancée!

Well, he shrugged mentally, No big deal. Better to do it now before marriage than in marriage. And of course, it is never going to happen again.

He looked at the other side of the bed and saw that it was empty, where was… he struggled a bit to recall her name… yeah Dara. Where was Dara? Could she have gone? She must have. He shrugged again and stood up. He needed to brush, and go for his morning jog.

As he was about opening his bathroom door, he heard a sound like someone talking and paused, listened closely. It was the sound of someone singing, a woman singing. He abandoned his brushing quest and went out of the room, trailing the voice. It was coming from the kitchen. He went in and found Dara there. She was wearing a singlet and pair of shorts – his singlet and pair of boxer shorts – and was busy doing the dishes. He was shocked.

“I thought you had gone,” he said to her.

“Gone? I can’t go without even saying goodbye now,” she smiled at him, her very white eyes shining even brighter this morning.

“But why are you doing the dishes? You don’t need to; don’t stress yourself.”

“No, it’s not stress. I made breakfast and noticed the dirty dishes, so I decided to wash them.”


“Yes, I made fried plantain and fried eggs.”

“That’s nice, thanks. But I don’t usually eat till 12 noon.”

“Really, why?” she asked. “Are you watching your weight? You don’t need to jor. Your body looks really good.” She flashed him a quick look and quickly looked away again with a shy smile.

Chime had to cancel his exercise ritual and have breakfast with her. He found it more than a little weird eating breakfast at his dining table with this stranger he had only met last night. Their contract was a sex romp, not all of this. He recalled Anu’s missed call, he was yet to return it and she would call again anytime soon, he would not be able to pick it with this girl still in his house. He needed to get her out as quickly as possible.

When they were done eating, he said to her, “Go and prepare so that I can drop you off at school.”

“Oh… but I thought I would be spending the weekend with you.”

Weekend ko.

“No, I have some business meeting this afternoon and need to prepare for it. I will also be very busy tomorrow,” he lied to her.

She obediently went into the bedroom to have her bath and dress up. Chime was ready when she was done, having had a quick shower in the guest room. He picked up his wallet and counted out fifteen 1,000 notes and handed them to her.

“What’s it for?” she blanked.

Chime was taken aback, “I don’t know, use it for recharge card or something.”

“I don’t want it, I’m not here because of money.”

Now, that was new. Chime had met sarewagbas that did not really care about money in his time of working the fields; they never set out demanding money for their services, but they never rejected it when offered either.

“I’m not trying to insult you or anything,” he went diplomatic. “Just see it as a gift…”

“If you want to give me a gift, you can buy me something nice… a real gift,” she informed him.

Buy you a gift? Aunty, I don’t plan on seeing you again after today, Chime thought to himself, placing the rejected money back in his wallet. Your loss.

He drove her back to school and when they got there, she turned to him and asked, “So when am I seeing you again?”

“I will call you soon,” he lied.

“But you don’t have my number.”

He brought out his phone and asked her to call out her number, entering it into his phone as she did but not saving it.

“Give me yours too,” she demanded of him.

He had no intention of doing that. Something about the way she had begun to act clingy this morning had his alarm bells going off. Cleaning up his house, refusing the money he had given her, and wanting him to buy her gifts? She was definitely looking for more than a momentary fling, and he was not ready for any repeat occurrence of what they did last night. Fidelity was the only thing for him from this point on.

“Don’t worry, I will call you,” he assured her, without giving her his number.

Finally she got out of the car but not before beseechingly saying, “I will be expecting your call. Today?”

He nodded… anything to get her off. He watched her disappear into her hostel then drove off. Now he could call his beloved wife-to-be.

The Story Continues>>>Click Here for Part 2

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